Why did you leave me?
We had grown tired together. Don’t you remember?
We’d grown tired together, were going through the motions.

Why did you leave me?
I don’t know, really. There was comfort in that tiredness.
There was love.

Why did you leave me?
You began to correct my embellishments in public.
You wouldn’t let me tell my stories.

Why did you leave me?
She is… I don’t wish to be
any more cruel than I’ve been

You son-of-a-bitch.
Why did you leave me?
I was already gone.
I just brought my body with me.

Why did you leave me?
You found out and I found I couldn’t give her up.
I was as shocked as you were.

Why didn’t you lie to me?
I was already lying to you. It was hard work.
All of it suddenly felt like hard work.

Why did you leave me?
I wanted to try monogamy again.
I wanted the freedom to be monogamous.

You fucker. You fucking son-of-a-bitch.

Why did you leave me?
I wanted you both. I thought I could be faithful
to each of you. You shouldn’t have made me choose.

Don’t you know what betrayal is?
I never thought of it as betrayal. More like one pleasure
of mine you should never have known.

You really are quite an awful man.
Why did you leave me?
It was time to leave.
The hour of leaving had come.

Why did you leave me?
It would take too long to explain. Please
don’t ask me to explain.

Will you not explain it to me?
No, I will not explain it to you. I’ll say anything
rather than explain it to you. Even things that sound true.

This talk by Dean Poole is a gem.

ABC according to Dean Poole

New Zealand-based art director Dean Poole started his presentation at Design Indaba drawing out the forms of the letters we use, and take for granted, every day.

A is an H designed by an architect

B has a figure and is working on it

C got separated from O and never healed

D ate too much

E is the cannibal with a fork

F is the victim

G swallowed its tongue

H raised the bar

I the naturalist

J the naturalist arouse

K shoots from the hip

L is flatfooted

N is a Z that never got out of bed

O likes to sing 

Q pokes fun at O

R is poser

S suffers from motion sickness

T is I that branched out

V has split ends

W is Ping-Pong

X is busting to relieve itself

Y gives you options

Z sidesteps most situations

Tsumani, waves, sea, recurring, but it always passes and I always remain safe and unscathed in the house, but the house/etc are destroyed. The aftermath is pretty bad. In fact everything is destroyed except me.

Toilets, futuristic, impossibly sophisticated, mechanical, automated

Toilets, over-wrought sophistication (luxury, perfume and white flowers — someone’s lousy try-too-hard idea of faux luxury and sophistication, that did not quite work in reality, after several people had used the toilet. I also saw what it looked like before it was used. It was a dent in the ground, covered with perfume and large white flowers, which I guess you were supposed to pee over, but after you did that, it seemed like the flowers etc drained to the side, in a line?). Male basket and female basket. Female basket went down, Male basket was at same level. Male toilets converted to female toilets. Bunch of salarymen, Asian, possibly Japanese, in office wear (white, striped shirts, black pants) waiting to use the toilet ahead of me.

Lesbian sex, recurring, rape — I wasn’t impressed. Happened in the thick curtains before I got to the toilets. I felt the thickness of the curtains. He said, “It’s happened before, right? During 7-11.” But it wasn’t during 7-11, so I looked him in the eye and said no. His eyes were red. I tried not to cry after. Something he knew about me that he’s using as evidence against me.

Elevator going past the top floor of a block of flats, where it looks broken or unfinished

Escalators, rushing around looking for escalators going up, sometime to run into escalators that are both coming down (roadblock), confused, hurried

Spiral staircase, white sheet metal, not grills, very clean minimalist design

Another staircase, with polished wood banisters, very smooth, sliding downwards.

“I am still a staff writer,” to Mr Leet, while undercover as a “client” (media, member, high-society people.)

“What is the push factor?”

“There is more a pull factor — the call of the wild / unknown.”

“The problem / thing with you is that the self-motivation is so strong…”

“To come back here only to find that everything and everyone is still the same, including myself.” — disappointment

Writing test, accused of cheating, but vindicated by CCTV

 

 

The odds of existence
of being precisely who you are
are slim

In fact, the odds are almost zero
but here you are
here you exist

so remember the next time
the odds are against you
that you’ve already beaten
the slimmest odds in the universe
before.

from

We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice —
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
‘Mend my life!’
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.

You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations  —
though their melancholy
was terrible. It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.

But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice,
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do — determined to save
the only life you could save.

 

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karen does nothing

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